The Fluidity of Rest: Recharging like the Moon
Auf Deutsch: Die Fluidität der Ruhe
This article is inspired by the contents of our ‘Journey to Balance’ eBook.
As so many of us, I, too, have a nuanced and sometimes complicated relationship with rest. Being familiar with anxiety, for a long time I don’t even think I knew how to rest. And when trying to relax, I wondered why lying in a bubble bath or reading a book on the couch made me feel fidgety, distracted, uneasy. When trying to catch up on some sleep, I would find myself staring at the ceiling. Can you relate?
Now, as I understand myself (a little!) better and have also explored the ways of the nervous system much more, I get why the perhaps common aesthetic of rest didn’t always work for me, or come naturally to me. It wasn’t what I needed at the time. Of course, for an anxious brain it’s agony to sit still, let alone feel like it (and I) could unwind. Making myself rest in the cookie cutter way I saw around me only made me… restless, really. That’s when I realised: rest is a multi-layered, ever-changing concept. We are fluid beings, with shifting needs and changing desires, and we need to approach the ways in which we fill up our cup in exactly that same manner.
I want to invite you here, to think back on the last time you felt truly rested. What did you do? Chances are, it’s not always a good night’s sleep, or a bubble bath. Of course, it totally can be, but sleeping is not the same as resting. The latter encompasses so much more.
Think back on a few times where you felt like you filled up your cup. Perhaps you read something inspiring, that stuck with you for a moment. Perhaps you did something creative, and felt joyful whilst doing it. Perhaps you had a meaningful conversation with a loved one, and left feeling seen and heard. All of these things can fill up our cup. And isn’t that what rest is about? To feel like we’re pouring energy into our lives, into our physical body, and our souls?
Dr. Saundra Dalton-Smith developed the concept of the seven types of rest, which speaks to our multi-layered sense of Self and how we may meet different needs and desires within us, with different ways to restore and re-inspire.
This idea of fluidity of rest offers us tools to explore our inner ebb and flow. We often need different things in different seasons of nature, of our life, at different points in our menstrual cycle (if you’re currently experiencing one) or simply what we can fit into our day sometimes. But it’s never a bad idea to invite a little more Yin, a little more softness, a little more gentleness, and a little more care to our lives. This will always have a positive effect - especially if you explore ways in which you can meet yourself in that particular moment. Not out of habit, but out of curiosity what it may look like today to fill up your cup.
Just as the moon ebbs and flows with her energy, we recharge differently day-by-day too. So what if we look at these seven types of rest through the lens of an energy cycle? If it resonates, this can be the lunar cycle, or the cycle of the seasons, or your menstrual cycle - or simply the idea that you’re currently in a particular season of your life. Allow this to offer you inspiration as to how you can approach rest, and how that may land in your body, mind and soul today.
Energetic Cycles & The Seven Types of Rest
New Moon | Winter | Menstrual Phase
Physical rest: This is the time to let go of physical tension and exertion. So yes, sleep, but also: soft Yoga practices and Yoga Nidra, deep belly breaths, gentle walks.
Mental & Sensory rest: This is a great opportunity to practice more mindfulness. How many times a day do you attempt to multi-task? See if you can be fully present in what you’re doing, even if it’s as simple as brushing your teeth or cooking a meal without distraction. A digital detox can contribute to this type of rest: by reducing external stimulation, your brain and nervous system get a break.
Waxing Moon | Spring | Follicular Phase
Creative rest: You might feel like there’s desire to open yourself up to inspiration and create something with your hands! Perhaps that’s creating a moodboard, cooking or baking, taking up a new hobby… What does it mean for you to be creative? And, if you get stuck: what did you love to do as a child? This very often guides us back to a place of uncomplicated creativity, simply for the sake of feeling excitement and joy.
Full Moon | Summer | Ovulation Phase
Spiritual rest: In this phase, you may have more physical energy and might be craving more fulfilment on a soul level. This may look like contributing to something bigger than yourself, such as volunteering or helping out a friend in need. Spiritual rest may also look like taking a break from shadow work, and releasing the pressure on yourself as a ‘project’, but landing in a sense of ‘enoughness’.
Waning Moon | Autumn | Luteal Phase
Emotional rest: Take a moment to process your emotions. You may wish to express them by using a journal, seeing a therapist or calling a friend. You may consciously take a step back from a situation that is causing you distress. Offer your emotional landscape a little exhale here, in whatever way serves you.
Social rest: Recharge your social battery! This can go both ways: maybe you’re craving meaningful connection or time on your own, or perhaps a conscious mix of both. When our energy wanes, it can be hard to stay committed to plans you perhaps made in a different phase of your energetic cycle. Ask yourself: what would really serve me now? Staying home, or connecting with a loved one (or whatever the choice is, of course). What would fill my cup the most?
There is no right or wrong way to approach this. Your interpretation of rest can be fluid not just in how you approach the types of rest, but how you perhaps weave them together in any given moment. You can combine Mental Rest and Creative Rest by doing something mindful such as colouring in, painting, or anything else with your hands that keeps you off your phone and engaged in the activity. You can weave together Creative Rest and Spiritual Rest by cooking food for a loved one who’s going through a difficult time. There are so many ways to approach this. Let this concept of fluid rest offer you tools to nourish yourself - not just resting more (which we could probably all use), but resting through a wider variety of options.
I would love to hear how you weave in these types of rest for yourself. If you’re curious: for me, this is something I am always exploring further. What helps me relax and unwind isn’t necessarily the same every day, and is for sure very different than what it would have been last year or the year before. That is because as my life changes, where I live or what I do for work or the responsibilities I have at home change, so does my capacity. And that ever fluid cup that wants to be filled: that changes too. So, this past week, for example, my period was a couple of days late. I could feel a sense of heaviness, and tiredness, and I knew that what I usually would do this deep into my luteal phase (drink my favourite raspberry leaf tea mix, get cosy on the couch with my favourite blanket and a good book) just wasn’t fully cutting it. And what was different, too, was that the outside season did not mirror the heaviness I was feeling inside: it was sunny, and signs of Spring felt abundant. So, instead, I opted to go for a gentle walk with one of my dogs, and set up a comfortable spot in my garden afterwards to enjoy the sun. Not what I thought I needed, but what met me with gentleness and a deep exhale regardless. It showed me, once again, that rest doesn’t have to look a certain way. But it for sure can be an invitation to explore how it may feel, and what feeling may offer your soul.
The intention to go beyond sleep to define what rest is for you, blows the possibilities to feel inspired and rejuvenated wide open. Perhaps you can set aside some time per week to ask yourself the question, ‘what could rest look like today?’, and then act on that. Stay curious, flow with the ebb and flow of your needs and desires, and embrace your wonderfully multi-layered Self. Your body, mind and soul will thank you for it.